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Professional footballers are often living the dream, playing the sport they love and earning handsomely – at the highest level of the game, anyway.
But there are downsides. In recent years, many players have opened up on their mental health struggles, addictions and depression.
Sometimes, those problems are exacerbated by long periods on the sidelines – and players’ careers are often over before they even begin, due to injury.
From hamstring tweaks to ACL tears, injuries are part of life for a professional footballer. Here, though, is a look at some of the most ridiculous and avoidable fitness problems suffered by players over the years…
32. Leroy Lita
Staying in bed would seem like a pretty much guaranteed way of avoiding an injury. But not for former Reading striker Leroy Lita.
The ex-England Under-21 forward trapped a nerve in his leg and missed the opening three games of the season after a morning stretch. “It’s not an injury that should be ridiculed,” Reading boss Steve Coppell said. It was, though.
31. Alan Wright
Former Aston Villa defender Alan Wright bought himself a Ferrari during his time at the Birmingham club – but the sports car did not turn out to be a good purchase for the full-back.
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Due to the unique positioning of the accelerator pedal, the 5ft 4in (1.63m) Wright struggled to reach and injured his right knee as he stretched to put his foot down. He ended up getting rid of the car and using a club-sponsored Rover instead.
30. David Batty
David Batty started and finished his career with hometown club Leeds United and also had spells at Blackburn Rovers and Newcastle United.
The former England midfielder was a hard man on the pitch, but his recovery from an Achilles tendon injury was delayed after he was run over by his toddler on a tricycle.
29. Darren Barnard
Darren Barnard is best remembered for a five-year spell at Barnsley between 1997 and 2002, racking up over 200 appearances and impressing for the Tykes in their brief stay in the Premier League.
But the Welsh international also missed five months of action with a torn knee ligament. Barnard slipped on a wet kitchen floor after his wife had cleaned up their puppy’s urine and had to have surgery to repair the problem.
28. Milan Rapaić
Milan Rapaić won almost 50 caps for Croatia between 1994 and 2007 and had spells at Perugia, Fenerbahce and Standard Liege in a well-travelled career.
The attacking midfielder aso had two stints at Hajduk Split and in one of those, he missed the start of the season after poking himself in the eye with his boarding pass.
27. David James
David James earned the unfortunate nickname Calamity early in his career after a number of high-profile blunders – and he also picked up a couple of strange injuries.
The former Liverpool, West Ham and England goalkeeper once pulled a muscle in his back while reaching for the television remote control and also hurt his shoulder on a fishing trip as he attempted to haul in a monster carp.
26. Alan Mullery
Alan Mullery missed England’s South American tour in 1964 after somehow managing to put his back out while brushing his teeth.
The former Tottenham and Fulham midfielder had to wait until later in the year for his international debut, but was not called up for the 1966 World Cup. He was the first ever England player to be sent off when he was shown the red card at Euro 1968 and won 35 caps in total.
25. Chic Brodie
Former Brentford goalkeeper Chic Brodie once collided with a dog which ran on the pitch during a match in October 1970.
The Scottish shot-stopper shattered his kneecap and never played again. “The dog might have been a small one, but it just happened to be a solid one,” he said.
24. Mario Balotelli
Mario Balotelli had to be substituted by Manchester City in the Sky Blues’ Europa League last-16 first-leg clash away to Dynamo Kyiv in March 2011 for a highly unusual reason.
Feeling unwell and suffering with a swollen face, Balotelli was withdrawn and manager Roberto Mancini later explained the former Italy striker had suffered an allergic reaction to the Kyiv grass. Why always him?
23. Alex Stepney
Long before Peter Schmeichel bellowed at his Manchester United team-mates for the first time, 1960s legend Alex Stepney regularly bawled at his defenders during his 12 years at Old Trafford.
But shouting at his back line proved costly for Stepney in a match against Birmingham City in 1975 as the goalkeeper was left with a dislocated jaw. It must have been some really bad defending.
22. Martín Palermo
Martín Palermo’s career in Europe did not live up to his exploits in Argentina and the Boca Juniors legend was sidelined for five months following a freak injury at Villarreal.
After scoring in a Copa del Rey clash against Levante, Palermo celebrated by standing on a small concrete wall, but it collapsed under the weight of his team’s fans, leaving him with a fractured tibia and fibula in his left leg.
21. Kasey Keller
Kasey Keller won 102 caps for the United States between 1990 and 2007 and played in the Premier League for Tottenham, Leicester City, Fulham and Southampton.
One of the USA’s best-ever goalkeepers, Keller once suffered a bizarre injury as he knocked out his front teeth as he removed his golf clubs from the back of his car. Ouch.
20. Charlie George
Arsenal legend Charlie George suffered an unfortunate accident while cutting the grass during his time as a Southampton player in 1980.
The forward lifted up his lawn mower to remove some grass, only for the blades to move and chop off his index finger. George joked that he would not be able to take a throw-in or stick up two fingers, but went on to play for three more seasons.
19. Kevin-Prince Boateng
Kevin-Prince Boateng suffered a series of muscular injuries during his time at AC Milan and after he was ruled out for a month with a thigh problem in January 2012, his girlfriend offered up a theory.
“The reason why he is always injured is because we have sex seven to 10 times a week,” Melissa Satta told Vanity Fair. Bonkers.
18. Richard Wright
Former Everton goalkeeper Richard Wright was ruled out of an FA Cup fourth-round replay against Chelsea in bizarre circumstances in January 2006.
Wright ignored a sign in the goalmouth which instructed players to use temporary goals for their warm-up and proceeded to fall on it, spraining his ankle and missing several weeks of action.
17. Frenkie de Jong
Barcelona midfielder Frenkie de Jong took to the field against Napoli in the Champions League in August 2020 with a heavily bandaged left hand.
The Dutch international was stung by a bee and later shared an image of his extremely swollen hand. It didn’t stop him from playing, though, and he impressed in a 3-1 win at Camp Nou.
16. Philippe Mexes
AC Milan defender Philippe Mexes missed a Champions League clash against Celtic in November 2013 with a rare eye condition called central serous retinopathy.
Club doctors were left puzzled by the problem, but reports in the Italian media claimed it had been caused by the Frenchman spending “too much time on sunbeds”, with Tuttosport noting that the centre-back had looked particularly bronzed of late despite Milan’s cool conditions late in the year.
15. Marco Asensio
Marco Asensio missed Real Madrid’s Champions League clash against APOEL in September 2017 with an infected pimple after shaving his legs with an epilator.
The report was confirmed by coach Zinedine Zidane, who said the pimple had left the midfielder unable to pull up his socks. Asensio was mocked mercilessly on social media.
14. Bryan Robson
England captain Bryan Robson ended up sitting out most of the 1990 World Cup due to an Achilles tendon injury picked up against the Netherlands, but the former Manchester United midfielder almost missed the tournament altogether after an incident involving Paul Gascoigne.
Amid what Robson described as “daft banter” in the team hotel, he tipped Gascoigne off his bed, only for the bed to slip and take off part of his toenail. Robson needed a pain-killing injection to be able to get through the first game.
13. Emerson
Emerson was Brazil’s captain heading into the 2002 World Cup, but the midfielder broke his arm in a training session ahead of the first game as he attempted to parry a team-mate’s shot while playing as a goalkeeper.
Replaced in the squad by Ricardinho and as skipper by Cafu, the former Roma and Juventus player could only watch from the sidelines as his team-mates took home the trophy without him. His forlorn expression in the above image pretty much sums it up.
12. Michael Rensing
Michael Rensing spent seven seasons at Bayern Munich, but was back-up goalkeeper for most of that time and made just 83 appearances for the Bavarian giants.
Rensing suffered a back injury while tying up his shoelaces, causing him to miss a few games, and he also injured team-mate Oliver Kahn with a fierce shot in a warm-up which left the legendary goalkeeper with a black eye and ruled him out of the match.
11. Paulo Diogo
In a game for Servette against FC Schaffhausen in December 2004, midfielder Paulo Diogo set up a goal for team-mate Jean Beausejour late in the game, but was badly injured in the celebrations.
Diogo jumped onto the perimeter fence separating the fans from the pitch, but got his wedding ring stuck in the barrier and as he jumped off, it was torn off along with much of his finger. Doctors were unable to reattach the severed part of his finger and advised amputation to the first joint. Diogo continued playing until 2013.
10. Steve Morrow
Steve Morrow scored the winning goal for Arsenal against Sheffield Wednesday in the final of the League Cup at Wembley in 1993.
But the Northern Ireland international was injured in the celebrations as he was lifted up and subsequently dropped by skipper Tony Adams, breaking his arm and missing the rest of the season – including the FA Cup final win against Wednesday again the following month.
9. Ivano Bonetti
Ivano Bonetti played for some top Italian teams in the 1980s and early 1990s – including Juventus, Bologna, Sampdoria and Torino – before rocking up at Grimsby Town in 1995.
During his time at Blundell Park, the midfielder upset manager Brian Laws during a damaging defeat to Sheffield Wednesday for apparently lacking effort and the Mariners’ boss threw a plate of chicken wings at the Italian, which flew into his face and left him with a fractured cheekbone.
8. Dave Beasant
Dave Beasant was the first goalkeeper to save a penalty in an FA Cup final and went to the 1990 World Cup with England. He also missed eight weeks of action after dropping a bottle of salad cream on his foot.
Beasant captained Wimbledon to their FA Cup final win over Liverpool in 1988. He joined Chelsea the following year and during the 1993/94 season, dropped a 2kg bottle of salad cream while making a sandwich. Attempting to stop it from hitting the floor with his bare foot, he severed a tendon in his big toe and never played for the Blues again.
7. Rio Ferdinand
Rio Ferdinand’s impressive performances for Leeds United saw him become the world’s most expensive defender as he moved to Manchester United for a fee of £29.3 million with possible performance-related add-ons up to £33.3m.
But during his time at Elland Road, Ferdinand was out for several weeks with a strained tendon in his knee after watching television in one position for too long and trying to reach the phone with his foot.
6. Michael Stensgaard
Michael Stensgaard is not exactly a household name and the former Liverpool goalkeeper was obviously not cut for household chores, either.
Signed as back-up to David James, the Danish Under-21 international spent two years at Anfield but saw his hopes of first-team action ended as he dislocated his shoulder while trying to set up an ironing board.
5. Alessandro Nesta
Alessandro Nesta was sidelined for a month in late 2005 with a tendon injury in his thumb, which was apparently caused by too much time on the Playstation.
The legendary Italy defender later played down the injury, denying it had been caused by his penchant for video games, but AC Milan doctor Massimiliano Sala insisted use of the console had been to blame.
4. Darius Vassell
Best remembered for his time at Aston Villa and failing to convert England’s last penalty in a quarter-final shootout against Portugal at Euro 2004, Darius Vassell also suffered one of the strangest injuries in football history.
And unlike many of the other accidents on this list, his was entirely self-inflicted as he used a power drill to remove a blood blister under a toe nail and ended up with an infection. Oh, Darius.
3. Svein Grøndalen
Svein Grøndalen was a left-back or central defender who won more than 70 caps for Norway between 1973 and 1984.
But if you’ve heard his name before, it is more likely because he missed a World Cup qualification match after going out for a run in the forest and colliding with a moose. Yes, really.
2. Éver Banega
One of the most talented midfielders of his generation on the pitch, Éver Banega has had his share of problems off the field.
The former Argentina playmaker suffered a bizarre injury in February 2012 as he ran over his own foot after forgetting to apply the handbrake at a petrol station, leaving him with a fractured tibia and fibula. He went on to miss the rest of the season.
1. Santiago Cañizares
Santiago Cañizares was all set to be Spain’s starter in goal at the 2002 World Cup, but dropped a bottle of aftershave during a training camp and tried to stop the bottle with his foot, which left him with a severed tendon.
The former Valencia goalkeeper needed an operation and was ruled out of the tournament, with a young Iker Casillas going on to start instead. To this day, Cañizares says he is asked about the aftershave incident “two or three times” a month.
