Chiefsaholic Lawyer Drops Several Absurd Football Metaphors in Press Conference After Guilty Plea

On Wednesday, the Kansas City Chiefs superfan known as Chiefaholic (real name: Xaviar Babudar) pleaded guilty to the bank robbery charges he faced in federal court. His name and story have become so popular that even Adam Schefter has been tweeting about his trial, all the way to the guilty end. He faces a maximum of 50 years in prison.

Afterward the plea Babudar’s attorney, Matthew Merryman, spoke to reporters on the steps of the courthouse. Once again, he felt it necessary to communicate largely through football metaphors and it made for a surreal press conference experience. Not that the whole “Chiefs fan who dressed up as a wolf stole nearly a million dollars in a string of bank robberies” thing isn’t surreal enough on its own. Anyway, here’s Merryman, looking pretty merry following his client’s guilty plea.

Merryman previously attracted the attention of the football world back in August, when Chiefsacholic initially pleaded not guilty to the charges. He claimed then that it was not the fan’s “last drive.”

Much of the NFL community is being exposed to Merryman from the first clip today and they are reeling.

Points to leaning into his client’s most famous quality, I suppose. And it does take a modicum of creativity to apply football terminology to a bank robbery court case. If his lawyering skills are anywhere near as inventive as his media addresses then the Chiefsaholic guy will get probation instead of jail time.

A weird story that got weirder and weirder and now it feels like it has peaked. There’s still a sentencing hearing but it can’t get much weirder than this. Right?